Apps that roast you, sorted by what they roast

Updated October 21, 2026 · 6 min read · How we write these

Nularo reads your Apple Health and turns it into a creature that reacts to how you really slept and moved. Get it

Short answer

For a one-off roast, you do not need an app: paste a photo or a description into a chatbot you already use and ask it to roast you. The App Store's dedicated roast apps mostly do the same with a selfie, and many of the listings checked sell weekly subscriptions ($3.99 to $4.99 a week). The funnier roasts use real data: The Pudding's How Bad Is Your Streaming Music? (Spotify or Apple Music), Roast My Strava (your runs and rides), CARROT Weather (a snarky forecast) and Nularo (your sleep and activity from Apple Health, every morning).

Encouragement stopped working a while ago. Every app tells you that you are doing amazing, sweetie. You want one that looks at you and says what your friends are too polite to say. Good news: there are plenty. The catch is that most of them roast the same thing, and charge by the week to do it.

The free answer: ask a chatbot you already have

Search the App Store for "roast" and you get dozens of apps with nearly the same name. Most of them do one thing: you upload a photo or type a few lines about yourself, and an AI model writes jokes about it. You can do that without installing anything. Open a chatbot you already use (ChatGPT has a free tier), attach a selfie or a screenshot, and ask it to roast you. Ask for "gentle" or "brutal" and it will adjust.

This went viral in August 2024, when people sent ChatGPT screenshots of their Instagram feeds and posted the results. A later version of the trend asked ChatGPT to roast users based on everything it remembered from past chats, which Tom's Guide found felt uncomfortably tailored. That is also the warning: a roast built from memory is only funny if you are fine with what it remembers. If your chatbot has memory turned on, check what it knows before asking.

The limitation of every photo or text roast is the same. It can only mock what you show it, so after the third go, the jokes about your haircut and your bookshelf start to repeat. The roasts people actually keep sharing are the ones built on data: what you listened to, how fast you ran, how late you went to bed.

The App Store roast apps: heat levels and weekly plans

The dedicated apps add some packaging on top of the chatbot trick. Typical features from their App Store listings:

The business model is the thing to watch. Several of the top results are free to download, give you a few roasts and then ask for a subscription, and weekly plans are common. Across the listings checked in October 2026, weekly prices ran from $3.99 to $4.99. For example, Roast App・Roast Your Friends lists $4.99 a week or $19.99 a year. A weekly plan you forget about costs over $200 a year, for jokes a chatbot will write for free.

Two checks before you start a trial. First, scroll to In-App Purchases on the App Store page and see whether the cheapest plan is weekly. Second, read the App Privacy section. Apple requires developers to list data "Used to Track You" and data "Linked to You", and you are about to hand a stranger a photo of your face. If you do subscribe, cancelling is in Settings, then your name, then Subscriptions.

Apps that roast what you actually did

These are the better roasts, because the material is real. Each one connects to a service that already has your data, so the joke lands on your actual choices instead of your forehead.

Your music: How Bad Is Your Streaming Music?

The Pudding's music roast bot started in December 2020 as a Spotify roast and now works with Spotify or Apple Music. You log in, it reads your top artists, tracks and recent playlists, and a pretentious "AI" interrogates you about them before labelling your taste with a multi-hyphenated flavour of bad. The Pudding says it is not really AI: it mixes jokes written by its team with data about the artists, albums and genres you play. It is free, it runs in a browser, and The Pudding says it does not keep your music data.

Your runs and rides: Roast My Strava

Roast My Strava is a side project by developer Jason Kuperberg, who described on Strava's community forum how he got the idea from people asking ChatGPT to roast their Instagram. You connect your Strava account on the website and it writes a roast from your activity history. It is a website, not an App Store app, and it only sees what is on Strava.

Your weather: CARROT Weather

CARROT Weather is the veteran of the genre: a full weather app whose forecaster is a sarcastic AI. The App Store listing offers five personalities, from a straitlaced "professional" (no jokes) to a profanity-laden "overkill", so you set the heat yourself. It is free to download, with a Premium subscription for extras like more data sources, notifications and widgets. The same developer makes CARROT Fit, a workout app where a sadistic AI trainer calls you a meatbag through a seven-minute routine.

Your phone: no good option yet

A screen time roast seems like an obvious app, and none worth recommending turned up in research. Apple's Screen Time (Settings, then Screen Time) has the numbers but no jokes. The closest thing is SleepTown, which destroys the building you were constructing if you pick up your phone after bedtime. There is more on it in our guide to gamified sleep tracker apps.

Your sleep and steps: where Nularo fits

Full disclosure: Nularo is our app, and it exists because nothing on this list roasts the thing most of us are worst at. Your iPhone already knows when you went to bed and how much you moved. It just never says anything about it.

Nularo reads Apple Health, read-only: sleep and sleep stages, steps, active minutes, workouts, resting heart rate, HRV, respiratory rate and blood oxygen. You do not log anything or upload anything. Each morning you get a verdict notification, and a creature lands in one of four moods: glowing, fine-but-judgy, wrecked or suspicious. The mood is set against your own 14-day baseline, so a night that is bad for you gets called out even if it would be fine for someone else. Unlike a photo roast, the material changes every day, because you do.

Nularo's creature on the home screen, judging last night
Nularo's creature on the home screen, judging last night.

Around the creature: shareable roast cards for the group chat, a Bedtime Pledge you make at night and evening Confessions (both optional), a Weekly Report Card, and a weekly Creature Age with a per-habit breakdown of which habit added the years. Creature Age is a rules-based, for-fun number built from public-health guidelines, not a medical measure; we compare it with the serious versions in biological age apps for Apple Watch. If you want to roast a friend's week instead of your own, friend mode shows them your mood word and a good-day count, never your health numbers. More on that in sleep tracking with a partner or friends.

The honest limitations. It roasts one topic, your sleep and activity, so if you want jokes about your outfit, use a chatbot. It is iPhone only. It works the morning after, not in real time. Without an Apple Watch, Apple Health has much thinner sleep and heart data, so the roasts have less to work with. It judges and never coaches, so there are no tips at the end. And it is a subscription with a paywall after onboarding: $39.99 a year with a 3-day free trial, or $9.99 a month.

Which roast is right for you

One last thing: a roast is a joke, not a diagnosis. If something your health data shows is actually worrying you, that is one for a doctor, not an app with a heat dial.

Sources

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Frequently asked questions

Is there a free app that roasts you?

The easiest free option is a general chatbot such as ChatGPT: upload a photo or describe yourself and ask for a roast. The Pudding's How Bad Is Your Streaming Music? is a free website that roasts your Spotify or Apple Music taste. Many dedicated roast apps are free to download but limit roasts until you subscribe.

Are AI roast apps safe to use with a selfie?

That depends on the developer, and many of these apps come from small developers you have never heard of. Before uploading a face, open the app's App Store page and read the App Privacy section, which shows the data the developer says is used to track you or linked to you. If you would not want the photo kept, use a chatbot whose privacy settings you already know.

How do I cancel a roast app's weekly subscription?

On iPhone, open Settings, tap your name, then tap Subscriptions, pick the app and tap Cancel Subscription. Cancel at least 24 hours before the renewal date, which is when most of these listings say the plan renews. If the app is not listed there, it may have been bought with a different Apple Account.

Is there an app that roasts you for your screen time?

Not one worth recommending was found while researching this guide. Apple's Screen Time (Settings, then Screen Time) shows your daily and weekly usage, but without jokes. SleepTown, covered in our gamified sleep guide, punishes picking up your phone at night by destroying the building you were working on.

Does Nularo roast you?

Yes, about your sleep and activity. It reads Apple Health each night and sends a morning verdict, with a creature whose mood is set against your own 14-day baseline. It judges and never gives advice. It is iPhone only and a subscription: $39.99 a year with a 3-day free trial, or $9.99 a month.

Nularo is an entertainment and wellness app, not a medical device. Nothing on this page is medical advice. If something about your sleep or heart worries you, talk to a doctor.

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